It's morning again
They say, meditation in the veranda with soft breeze will heal you
They say,Yogurt and fruits for breakfast would be really healthy!
They say warm showers,Light music and books will refresh your mind!
Yet I couldn't find my peace in any of these
Not in moonlight or purple sky
Not in pop music or Sufi songs
Not in clicking candids and Scrolling Down the Instagram feed.
Not in daily soap dramas or English sitcoms
Nothing could motivate me... Not the speeches of people who I admire
Not the quotes which I saved on my phone for days like these.
I went to everyone, to each one of them who were once mine, those friends with whom I always enjoyed.
They told me, "You aren't broken, you aren't weak, you are just tired. You haven't lost the battle, you have just stopped fighting for a while."
Now I do everything to come out of this, I believe in 11:11 wishes ,In that single eyelash that falls everytime I cry.
I wear a holy bracelet ,a locket and put a kajal in those dreamy eyes.Hoping maybe these things will work. I try to read, I try to sing I try to do zillion things to make myself feel Alive.
Yet I fail miserably. They say that everything looks beautiful when we have stability inside.
Tell me how can I stay okay with the conquering thoughts that prevail every time I close my eyes.
My mind is baffled with a lot of questions which nobody around me can answer
So I ask you.
Is it okay to stay like this and to give time some time.
Is it okay to have no boundaries for your thoughts, to take a chance and not regret it even if things go wrong.
Is it okay to do nothing for a while , to look them in the eyes and say you are not right.
Is it okay to live and breathe freely?
Is it okay to stay an old soul, a little nervous, messy and crazy.
Is it okay to not begin another morning like this....
To wake up and realise that the dark phase has ended.
That the dark phase has ended.