Deeper deceptions

Alekhya Valleru

The lure of childhood so long gone ; Why does it tug at me like an endless drone
The hope of return for days gone past; Never ceases to catch me most
For that’s the only element I miss; In a life that’s filled with materialist’s bliss
The leisure of being the same in and out everywhere; Putting up walls of defense no where
Made the yester years look like paradise; Not requiring to improvise
Just to make sure I acquiesce; To the society’s judging eyes

The independence of adulthood; Brought with it complexities manifold
That made me a schizophrenic; To roll along in the real world’s frolic
When did the masks I used on others to impress; Create an entity so enticing yet false
That my whole being submitted itself; To the false hopes held out by the crafty thief
Transcending the limits of deception; To cheat the one responsible for its conception

As life dragged on with no hope of respite;
The burden of falsities piling up with every hidden spite
The occasional outburst seemed to be the only recourse;
Helpless as I am in keeping my moods in an acceptable course
As I travelled farther and farther; With no goal achieved that satiates the thirst any further
And goals that missed, mocking me for my incompetence;
In a world that runs on the ammunition of successful pretence
The raising of insurmountable barriers; Seemed the only plausible defence;
So that none are left capable of any offense
Before taking rejoice; In closing myself, out of choice
I saw looming on the horizon; A lonely island with no connection
As the bridge of love; Doesn’t exist anymore now
How can I remain faithful?; Cut off from access to inner well?

Held in the grip of falsity so strong; In hope of sailing along
The life of wonder; that childhood held out in memories yonder
Seems an impossibility; steeped in heightened responsibility
Will I ever be my real self? In a society that is not honest in itself
How do I uproot the infidelity, when the deception runs deep in the bones infinitely?

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