By Srisai Devikrishna D
Been painting with dark hues day in and out,
Succumbed to the lost self;
Where hostility, pain, numbness, alienation, lethargy glorify the sense of belonging!
Long curfew to the soul,
Its pitch dark and bleak all the time and you are seldom light – maybe Rumi was wrong!
Mere survival augurs cessation of the living-dead,
Deep silence roars self-loathing anthem,
Desperate to get back to life –
But visible and invisible scars have outgrown, leaving no choice...
And the Death toll of Adulting awaits,
What now?!
Wings been chopped,
Yet wanting to grow and thrive –
Why is it taking forever to soar again?!
"Even this shall pass;" well better be!
Where weeping became a ritual,
Voices unheard,
Scars unnoticed,
Mental wounds neglected,
Emotions bottled – where causes remain unknown,
For 'Some,' the reasons are well known –
They say it's all in your silly head,
Still it's contagious,
Another pandemic of Kali Yuga; blessed with modern tattoos –
Dark circles, Blackheads, Cysts and No Appetite,
Where PDD, PGH, Silent Attack, Fatigue, Mood Swings flaunt as novel lifestyle!
Messy room; disoriented self,
Where your 'Likes & Loves' become strangers,
Self-Hate escalates; a whole new 'Being' discovered – not so proud but loathsome, shocked & appalled.
Nobody cares; so do your soul???!!!
Welcome to the depressed club y’all,
Not a single shoulder to lean on.
Often been tagged as an outcast, a loner, a weirdo, and stereotyped as bromide!
Tempts one to chain themselves,
Where worshipping the 'Theory of Relentless' becomes the norm,
Mindscape invaded by Polar Nights.
Disgust prevails... Alas!
From constant self-backstabbing to brainwashing to sabotaging;
Mind conspires eternal dictatorship,
Ugh a sadistic traitor it is!
None to save you;
Dear you are invisible yet invincible!
Hey guess what, it's the era of circumstantial togetherness after all,
What a pity!
Many things to be done
Yet can’t do...
While you flaunt with the 'Boiling Frog Syndrome,'
Humdrum fills the air; Desolation wraps your soul.
Unable to pick calls or respond to texts,
Seldom present at the moment!
As your very own life goes unanswered,
Refuge comes with being Coffeeholic, Stargazer, Shut eyed, Slumber, Unconscious Scroller, perhaps an Artist too;
Masking creeps in...
What have ya become?!
A real-time Pain-eater and Time-murderer!!!
Pretends like nothing happened.
Yes the struggle is real,
Moments of existence are not reels to swipe –
Up and down.
Sounds topsy-turvy huh?!
That's the year's black hole –
You are sucked in!
This voyage is hard,
Still you make it every day,
Eke outta living, but for whom?!
None.
Do you even exist for the very "You"?!
Nope.
Won’t you save yourself out of this crap?!
"Uhm yup, but Hell nope."
"To Be or Not to Be" – I feel you Hamlet!
The Time pass,
Dear you are still there,
Perhaps anchored to the state of "L'appel du vide,"
Stuck in the labyrinth of loss,
Immobile isn’t it?!
Sheer Indifference is what you breathe,
Do something, ‘Dopamine!!!’
Wars are real,
This phase is the WW III,
But you don’t hear bomb blasts or gun shots,
Wounds remain undercover.
It’s just deep silence that kills
Or maybe more than that.
I know we all have been there,
Will be there again...
So what,
Your only ‘Pillow and Bed’ awaits to console,
And the blazing Star tries to cheer you up every day,
Be grateful.
Geez at least they neither blindly judge nor criticize.
Just Deep Sigh...
Until zesty tomorrow arrives,
It may pay a visit anytime.
Hold on tight.
Things happen.
Yet you shine through...
Hey,
Have Hope. Have Faith. Love Yourself.
Trust me, it’s not the end – flow with destiny.
I know it’s freaking hard but
You are not alone.
Higher Power never abandons,
Look for His cosmic signs.
Angels don’t stop watching,
Trust the timing – Heal, Heal, Heal
Through the Phantom Art!!!
Embrace those dark hues the way you do with the Rainbows,
Let it go graciously...
Periodt.