By Gauri Gaikwad
Mhmmm,
No, oh, oh,
I don’t want him,
I don’t want her,
I just want my darling,
Even if it won’t work
I can’t help myself when I see her, but now
am thinking should i just leave this now, should I leave this town
Cause no one’s coming home
No one’s saying hello
No one’s flying over to see us
No one’s coming home for this
Cause I guess it wasn’t love to begin with
And if it wasn’t love
Why would you say yes
In multiple ways and multiple times, for us, for us
If it wasn’t love
Why did you say you would come over
Come over someday and be in my arms
If it wasn’t love
Why would you say
You wanna meet me in the back of the lobby
Now I am standing there in the backseat
Hoping I see you, melting your ice cream in that dazzling glory
You know, just in case
So I think you should stay, you said, no
But I know the truth now, darling
If it was love, you would be coming right over
You would be coming right over to stay
Singing my name as your own
But you did, and you didn’t
You sang my name as your own
Wrote my name on your core
But I guess that faded away, it faded away and you forgot my name
And now am just checking in
Just in case you would wait
Cause I had planned out everything, every inch, you mapped out
In the pictures of love,
In the pictures of us
in the autumn of sun
Now, I don’t know about you, and I don’t know about us
But I can’t spill water on us and make the things undo
And forget everything like you do
So tell me, tell me
Where was I wrong
Was it that I didn’t talk enough
Was it that I was too scared to show myself
Too scared to let you go
Too scared to pull you close
Had it ever been enough
Had it ever been anything but love
Cause when I looked at you, I knew it wouldn’t last long
And that’s what you said—
We won’t last long, but last January
you held my hand as your own
And you would let it go as soon as the summer came back
I guessed you weren’t that cold
But no
You held my hand as your own, and then let it go
In the hopes that I would leave
And you were just confused
Why would I never leave
I just don’t know, I can’t understand
How could you think of me as your own
And ask why I didn’t let you go
I let you go darling, when you let me go
Though, how could I ever leaveeee
If you were never mine
So that makes it up
It wasn’t love
Then what was it
I know you told me you could love
But you don’t
And somewhere, something happened
And I thought you did
I thought you did love me
You did love me
You did love me when you called me your own
When you were begging for me to not let go, let u go
I just don’t know how that changes every time we talk
It changed, you changed
Baby, nothing feels the same anymore
I guess that feeling faded with age
With time, with place
With the things you were tempted by
And, I never felt enough
But I guess you never tasted it,
Tasted the poison of your love
So how could you know
How could we know
How could we know
We loved each other
If we never breathed the same air
Drank in the poison
Cheering for something that wasn’t for us
If we never sang the same songs
Together or alone
That weren’t written by any of us
If we never looked in each other’s eyes
Would you tell me?
How can we describe them
If I never saw you?
if i never held u?
Then why am I so scared of losing you,
losing you the whole time
I am so scared
Oh, darling, I am so scared
That I will never see you again
Never Touch you again
Never Miss you again
Never Love you again
If it wasn’t true
Then tell me
Why do I see your face in somebody else?
Why do I care?
Why do I feel it’s true?
And it will happen again and again and again
Every time I think about it
I think you will be back
At least that’s what you said
No darling, tell me
Why is your name on my chest..?