An Unspoken Goodbye ?

By Aparna

It’s hard not to look at you,
When in my mind,
Thoughts of you swirl around,
Like the restless wind sweeping through the town.

I open my eyes to capture your face,
And close them to lose myself in your tender embrace.

In your eyes, I read a book,
A book that has never been written before.

In you, I find a home,
A home I’ve never lived in before.
Yet the one I have always longed to return to.

Those eyes,
So divine, they could even make the sun lose its forever shine,
And go on to eclipse the moon,
Turning the darkest night into a blazing afternoon.

Your smile is a timeless art,
A masterpiece no sculptor could ever dream to mold.
Your chapter?
A page, I could never fold.

I kneel in reverence to your grace,
A presence so divine.
The proximity of which I cannot trace,
For words are too small to define.

Maybe, to you, I was of no true use,
But without you,
I was a bulb devoid of a fuse,
A writer bereft of a muse,
I was merely a wanderer, lost without a refuge?

Without you,
I was a chessboard bare of pawns,
A day that ached for the break of dawn,
Your absence was a silence I could never learn to mourn.

I existed in the backdrop of your world,
Hugging your shadows, never you.
I heard your voice in countless echoes,
Yet it never spoke my name.

Still, I was drawn to every fleeting glance,
To every word that lingered on your lips,
Wishing for a bond I knew could never exist.

You handed me a bouquet,
Its lively fragrance climbed slowly to my nostrils.
Then settled into the graveyard of my heart.

I stood there,
Staring at you wistfully,
As my gaze traced your steps.

The echoes of your memories grew louder,
As your presence slowly faded from the view.

I would still cherish,
The way you unknowingly taught me the beauty of love,
Even from afar.

Meeting you felt like my first glimpse of the unknown,
Yet looking into your eyes stirred a déjà vu,
Of a memory I had never owned,
But one I’ve always known.

When I met you,
It felt as though I’d found something I’d once lost,
But how could I have lost you?
When the moment I saw you, was the first time I ever knew you?

Our story lived in a book I couldn’t read,
Kept too high on the bookshelf,
Out of my reach.
I wish I were taller,
To grasp what was never mine.
I never got to open its pages,
To see the chapters we would never complete.

Some stories are meant to be recited,
Not to be lived out.

I looked at you and wondered,
How could I say goodbye,
When I can’t recall,
If we ever said hi?

The universe dared not inscribe those lines upon my hands,
Lines that defied the limits of its grandest plans.