What if I drown in my sea? – Delhi Poetry Slam

What if I drown in my sea?

By Prerna Mani 

 

What if I drown in my sea?

My heart
has sensed more betrayal than intimacy.
My skin
was sensitive to sensibility, not touch.
My eyes
hold fathomless emotion, not sight.

I have swallowed glasses of anger with some pain,
Drank a whole pool of agony,
And bathed in grief.
Engulfed all this just to raise my sea.

In the Sea, I see the pieces of me.
Each is a place or a person I’ve met.
None is mine but still is me.
Maybe I am more, more than me,
Or maybe I am none, none of me.

When I was a child, someone told me
To be born with this is a curse to me.
But I have watered my sea to be so vast.

Now that it is dark, and I am in the water,
My heart wrenches in pain: it bleeds, and aches.
Water rushes through my veins, my neck chokes,
Making it uneasy to breathe; my lungs are no longer capable

My knees turn weak; I couldn’t swim
My soul is drenched in pain; it weeps, but my eyes-
Every part of me is in chaos, but this sea,
This suffering is long, and the pain even longer.

The waves, as if art trying to end the artist,
The waves, as if vendetta trying to end its own blood.
And I must swim, else it will eat my soul
Like a body with no hope,
A child with no love.
I am scared of me too.
Help me before it engulfs me.

My hands were up in the air, my body stained with its color.
Please take me away before I become her.
My whole life, I’ve run away from her to escape her,
But maybe I was her this whole time.


I wished to be free, but my brain was too intrigued.
I wished to be free, but I am under this sea.
Oh! What a misery it is to be drawn in my sea.


1 comment

  • Remarkable…. depiction of said n unsaid words….. shown n unshown emotions….. Keep writing…..it will help u swim in the sea…..

    Shreya Sakshi

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