By Jeena Shaji
I’m wearing this dress after a long time
A gap long enough to have given me the conviction.
To forget and overcome the fallacy I held of it.
I kept this in the back of my cupboard
As the mere sight of it flashbacked to the day-
I never wish to go through again.
At the store, this floral dress caught my eye.
Without a second thought, I grabbed it
From the rack of elegantly displayed kurtas
One look in the mirror and I loved it.
I wore it with much confidence that day,
As I walked into the theatre with my husband.
I felt so comfortable in the soft cotton material
My husband who rarely compliments,
Commented on how it communicated me.
I was happy and excited to watch -those
Carefully curated festival movies
Oblivious of the anti-climax that was to follow.
A few minutes into the movie,
In the darkness of the theatre,
I was groped and the flowers on my kurta crushed.
The pursuit and confrontation with the culprit,
In an ice-cold body and a shivering yet bold voice
In this same beautiful Kurta was a battle.
The flowers withered away as I reached home
I blamed the Kurta and threw it away.
But my mind had to picture me in the Kurta
Every time I narrated the incident
And I hated it - not just once,
But every single time and all the flowers wilted.
My friends said I should never stop fighting-
For justice, for reviving the flowers.
Parents feared what people around will say,
A case being filed and I going to the court;
For being molested- was not a matter of pride!
The Kurta faded and became colourless.
The Police constable, who took my statement-
A woman said, you shouldn’t have taken it this far.
People do not approach the police or court
Fearing the formalities.
The magistrate, another woman
Just crumpled the left-over image of me in the kurta.
She wanted me to narrate the incident,
Like it happened in front of her eyes
I did, and the Kurta was pale
The day and the trauma relived
As a victim-tears running down my cheeks.
Soaking the Kurta in pain.
Before she put the lid on her pen,
She asked in a tone I am yet to decipher
“That’s all what happened, nothing serious?”
It took me a minute to take it in.
I stood silent and unbalanced
Weighed down by the heaviness of the Kurta..