By Nidhi Kulkarni
In that day,
my beautiful dream existed.
I was someone people liked,
I was someone people needed.
I loved the world, the color and beauty.
I wanted to be one who belongs here,
but I felt alone as an outcast.
The curious and judgmental gazes
opened my eyes.
I realized I'm not the one I think,
and people see me differently.
I noticed their whispers and realized
I am not special enough for the world.
I lost, the moment I started doubting myself.
I wasn't good at things other people were doing.
And what I was good at, I don't think anyone cared about.
I am walking in an endless journey,
when will this road end?
No one knows.
I want to age gracefully,
enough to be proud of who I am when I die.
But I get tired on the way,
the urge to give up gets more,
but then a little rest should be enough.
I tell myself to get up,
I want to see the beautiful end I dreamt of.
I'm not quiet,
I have a lot to say,
but I don't think anyone in this room will understand or care,
so I keep to myself.
I wanted to be kind but the world told me not to be,
or else you'll be invisible.
Being hated sounded better when I think of it.
In an endless universe,
you're replaceable, so be successful to make your presence felt,
but what's success?
To one it's respect, to one kindness,
to many it's being among the elites no matter the means.
If you can't be a good family, good friend, or a good human,
what are you so proud of?
Without gentleness, even the most beautiful places
would turn to hell.
Since when were humans the predators?
Since when were we so evil?
No one knows.
I've been taught God made us kind,
but if I have to survive,
I am told to be selfish.
When I'm being kind,
I get used, I get torn apart.
I feel kindness just takes me away from my dream,
but at least, I am happy.
Selfishness may get me things,
but kindness and gentleness brought me peace.
I pity the selfish,
I pity the cruel,
for they never knew true happiness.
They put the world in a bracket
and thought they knew everything,
but the universe is mysterious,
it never gives everything to a single person.
It's not that I forgot about my dream,
but I understood it,
and now I know where to go.
I'll spend my whole life falling and getting up,
because even with temptations on the way,
my beautiful dream whispers to me every day,
you only have to make
your presence felt to yourself,
when your soul knows it exists,
you'll reach me.