By Debarati Sen
Every time I try to break the barriers and the banalities
My role as a woman is being persistently questioned.
My benevolence as a female who is the epitome of benign kindness is in jeopardy.
My existence as a human being is growing in precarity
Being overshadowed by my existence as a woman.
Women aren't supposed to shout like that, they said
They gave me a cold stare everytime I raised an eyebrow and my voice
They did not find me 'feminine' enough.
They said I did not duplicate Goddess Lakhshmi in my posture and actions
I questioned why Lakhsmi? I could be Kali and still bear equanimity!
They snapped at me again for trying to defy the norms.
For not paying heed to their exigencies
They said this might be my worst deluge of mistakes
Not being coy enough
Not nodding to their patriarchal rants.
Trying to break free from the shackles of a dismembered identity.
If being vociferous meant being less of a woman
I am better that way!
looking for something more tangible than being 'feminine'.